


Clyde Donovan: The Man, The Myth, The Man.

by lordjenjen



Category: South Park
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-18 22:01:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20320183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordjenjen/pseuds/lordjenjen
Summary: My work for Clyde Week 2019. Each chapter will have its own summary, tags and notes. Please note: Day 2 is not safe for work.





	1. Day 1: King of Swag

**Author's Note:**

> Clyde wants a date with Bebe.
> 
> No warnings apply.

Day 1: King of Swag

“Just be yourself.” 

Clyde glared at Craig. He didn’t understand what it was like to date people in this day and age. High School dating was nothing like elementary school. He couldn’t just be himself, he needed something to set him apart from her other suitors. His peacock feathers needed to be the best. 

“Please. I need real advice. Like maybe rappel down the school? A hundred butterflies spelling out her name on a bouquet of roses?”

Kenny looked like he was praying as he took a deep breath and pointed his hands to Clyde. “Clyde. You’re an amazing guy. You’ve already got everything you need. Just walk up to Bebe and ask her out. No amount of extravagant displays will help you in the long run.”

Stupid. All of his friends were stupid. Kenny was hot, of course he didn’t need help getting a date. Clyde turned towards Jimmy. He would know. He’s funny and loveable.

“Jim-jam my man-”

“You just n-n-n-” Clyde was hanging on Jimmy’s every word. Finally some advice. “You just n-n-neeee. Just n-n-neeeeh. You just n-need self-confidence man. Women dig a man who’s fine with being himself.”

Clyde grabbed his food tray and stood. “Useless. All of you.”

Clyde narrowly missed crashing into Cartman who had been lurking behind him. “I couldn’t help but overhear your”  –  Cartman took a fry off Clyde’s plate, munching it down before he could say anything – “predicament. Let me help you.”

“Alright.” 

Clyde turned, ready to dump what was left of his unfinished lunch when he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

“Bring that.” Cartman stole a few more fries as he made his way out of the cafeteria. 

He was rather surprised to find Cartman had converted one of the stalls in the boys room to an office of sorts. It was obviously still a place he came regularly to crap, but Cartman had taken the biggest stall and put a pulldown table. A picture of himself in a suit hung on the wall as well as a framed certificate. It looked to be legit except it was from Trump University. Clyde wrinkled his nose is disgust, realizing that was the biggest piece of shit ever in this bathroom. He should leave but he needed help. He was desperate.

Cartman pulled up a file box and flipped through it, humming to himself as he went. His eyes darted between the files and Clyde before he finally let out a noise of satisfaction and pulled out a red file folder. 

“Set that down right here.” Cartman tapped the side of the table as he opened the file.

Clyde set the tray down. Immediately, Cartman continued shoving fries into his mouth.

“Basically, you’re what I classify as a Pre-Avengers Chris Evans. You got the jock status, we just need to make you”  –  Cartman tore his eyes away from the folder to look Clyde up and down  – “better. Small changes. Bulk up a bit more, change your walk, give you more of a sports style. I’ll help you out for the low price of $30.”

Clyde huffed. “I should have known this was all just one of your schemes.” 

“You want Bebe to notice you? Or would you rather she goes after the basketball star, Kyle?”

Of course he didn’t want her to start dating Kyle! But he also didn’t want to fork over money to Cartman. How did he even know this would work? Cartman was a con artist as much as he was a businessman. For all Clyde knew, the file he had there was blank.

“Why should I trust anything you’re saying?”

“This file holds all of your information. Clyde Donovan. Born April 10th, 5 feet 6 inches.” Cartman looked at Clyde and smiled. “A bit on the short side, huh?”

“I’m still growing.”

Cartman scoffed and went back to his folder. “Let’s see, 156 pounds, 2.8 grade point average-”

“Alright, but what does that have to do with helping me?”

“This folder contains all of you flaws as well as your strengths..” Cartman closed the folder and picked up the remaining half of Clyde’s burger. “With my plan, we can work around your weaknesses, fix what we can, and enhance your strengths. You maybe short and fat, but one of those we can fix while also enhancing things, like getting you a decent hair cut.”

“What’s wrong with my hair?” Clyde patted his head, hoping to fix anything wrong.

“Everything. So do we have a deal?”

Clyde sighed. This seemed to be one of Cartman’s better business ventures and he did need help, even though he wasn’t fat. He just had muscle weight.

“Fuck. Alright.”

***

Cartman slapped Clyde’s hand away from the popcorn bowl. He glared at the fat kid, wishing he’d just taken his changes with the butterflies and roses. Popcorn was at least healthy, but noooo. Cartman insisted he needed to lose 20 pounds as well as gain muscles, and then lose 10 pounds in water weight. That how you get defined muscles.

“It’s simple. I'm going to point out moves and points in the movie and you need to mimic them.”

“But isn’t Not Another Teen Movie a comedy? How does that help?”

“Yes, but Chris Evans is a dreamy beefcake in this. You do as he does and you’ll be a hunk. Now just follow Chris Evans.”

Clyde spent forever mimicking Chris Evans, forced to watch Not Another Teen Movie. Forced to endure Fantastic Four over and over. It was torture with the smell of popcorn wafting through the air. Cartman reassured him that their hard work would be worth it.

Movies weren’t even the worst part. Cartman made him push him in a wheelbarrow. He was forced to pull him around in wagon on morning runs. All while Cartman crammed food down his face hole. He’d give Clyde a protein shake, and then forced him to lug his fat ass in some absurd way while eating half a dozen breakfast burritos. He took him to get his haircut like Chris Evans. It was two weeks of hell in Clyde’s opinion. 

But the day came Cartman felt he was ready. He was still woken up obnoxiously early and greeted with a bag to the face.

“Put this on. You’ll wear this today.”

Clyde opened the bag to find clothes identical to what he owned. He didn’t say anything as he shoved one weak and tired leg into his pants followed by the other. It was exhausting, even just getting dressed. As Clyde slowly got dressed, Cartman went over the plan. It was simple really. Bebe always arrived at school 15 minutes early. Clyde would just slide on up to her locker, Cartman having distracted her posse, pop a few quick and smooth lines before asking her out for Friday night. A fleeting thought passed through Clyde’s brain. He tried so hard to gasp it, but the harder he tried the farther away it seemed to be.

He practiced his movies: the sly smile, the confident walk, flinging the letterman jacket off the shoulder. Cartman styled his hair as he recited his lines. By 6am they were done. Clyde groaned and laid back down on his bed, not caring what Cartman just went through to get his hair perfect. He was allowed a quick nap before being escorted off to school.

No breakfast. He needed to show off them muscles he'd gained in two weeks. 

They sat in Cartman's mom's car until Bebe arrived and entered the school. Clyde, tired and hungry, got out of the car and pumped himself up. 

_ I got this _ , he thought, shaking his whole body.  _ I am the king of this school. _ Clyde dabbed for good measure before making his way into the school, walking in a way that made him feel more confident. By the time he reached the doors, he felt like he truly had this in the bag. Of course Bebe wouldn't say no. He was a GOD!

Clyde finger gunned at guys and winked at a group of girls before making it to Bebe's locker. She turned away from Heidi who suddenly rushed off, to open the door. This was the moment. Clyde would just lean against the door, stopping her from opening it, drop a few lines and ask her out. 

As Clyde leaned against the locker, Bebe swung open the door which made a metallic sound as it connected with his nose. Clyde held back his tears, feeling the water pool in his eyes, as Bebe closed her locker a bit to see what happened.

"Oh. Hey Clyde." Bebe sounded cheerful enough at seeing him, but she didn't ask about his face, instead reopening her locker just short of his nose.

"Hey, gorgeous. You come here often." 

Bebe let out a light laugh. "It's school, Clyde. Of course."

"Of course you do."

"Clyde," Bebe slammed her locker shut and looked him dead in the eye, "what do you want?"

"I just wanted to ask you a question. Are you made of Beryllium, Gold and Titanium? Because you are-"

"-beautiful. Yeah. Kyle tried that last week."

"Your eyes are like-"

"-a galaxy of stars in the ocean night. Butters tried that one."

Clyde's face dropped. "What the hell!"

"Maybe don't pay Carman for advice and just ask me out like a person." 

"I can't do that. You're like if mother nature materialized into human form and graced us with beauty. You're like if George Carlin and Robin Williams had a baby and their humor manifested itself in you. You're like Medusa before the bad things happened to her. I can't just ask you out like a person!" 

"How would you ask me out then? How would Clyde Donovan ask me out?"

Clyde rolled his eyes and leaned against the lockers, giving Bebe his best sexiest look he had. "Hey," he said in the deepest voice he could muster. "I put the STD in stud. All I need is the U."

The slight smile that crossed Bebe's face made him realize he did just need to be himself. Clyde gave her a half-smile and continued.

"How about you help me out with that on Saturday."

"We have a game?" Clyde felt stupid but the smile kept him going.

"Sunday?" He asked dropping into his normal voice.

"On a school night?"

"Next Friday?"

"Another Game."

"Saturday."

"Sure I'll go to homecoming with you. Dress nice."

Bebe had hardly turned away before he started his victory dance. He stopped partway into the robot as realization dawned on him. 

"Wait! Homecoming!?"


	2. Bros will be Bros (Explicit!!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clyde and Kenny help solidify their broship by being bros. 
> 
> Tags: NSFW, hand jobs, not gay if the balls don't touch, rediculous porn movie

Day 2

“It’s called Edward Penis Hands and its a fucking classic, Clyde. How have you not seen it?”

Clyde shrugged at Kenny, smile still plastered on his face from the slight buzz he had going. “I don’t know dude. Not everyone has an extensive collection of absurd porn.”

Kenny gasped, faking being offended. “How dare you. It’s not absurd!”

“Dude. You have a full line of porn parodies.”

“And they are amazing! Just- just hang on.”

Clyde laughed as Kenny scooted off his bed to find the DVD in question. 

“Are we really going to watch this? Now?”

Kenny re-emerged holding the DVD case. “What’s a few beers and porn amongst friends?”

Clyde snorted as he finished the last of his third beer. He had no idea why he was drinking this horrid drink, he was pretty sure beer wasn’t supposed to taste like gym shorts. But Kenny had assured him if he drank it fast enough, before it got to warm, it wasn’t too bad. Even the cold one was disgusting, and they just got worse. The slight buzz hardly made the lasting effect of constantly wanting to gag worth it all.

“You can’t keep calling this beer.”

“Alright. Pitch in next time and I’ll make Kevin buy us something sweeter. Maybe wine. Get fancy drunk.”

Clyde had no chance to respond as the porno started. It started in a way that was very much like Edward Scissorhands but yet not. Even the low quality of a woman walking around, yelling “Hello” in a weird warehouse setting, screamed terrible porn movie. Clyde couldn’t help but snort. It wasn’t even three minutes in and he was trying not to laugh. Kenny let out a small laugh and elbowed Clyde. 

“Dude. It’s just about to get good.”

“Wha-” Clyde couldn’t even finish the word before he and Kenny were both laughing. 

The camera angle on your first real view of Edward was enough to kill any man. The dialogue wasn’t helping at all. Clyde couldn’t hold back as it shifted tones and suddenly the dildo sales woman was without clothing. Despite seeing the zip ties holding on the dildo hands, despite how Edwards flopped around his dong hands, the minute she started sucking on the fake dicks, Clyde started getting horny. It was ridiculous and over dramatic and turning him on. Their laughter died down as they concentrated more on the porn aspect of the movie. 

“I actually hate how fake she is.” Clyde grunted in agreement. He liked watching porn with Kenny since they had similar taste. “But I kinda wish I had dildos for hands. Just so I could use my mouth and my dick at the same time.”

Clyde turned towards Kenny. “But then how would you touch your dick? How would you get off?”

“I mean, I guess I’d have to rely on others. Clyde, wouldn’t you help me get off?”

Clyde scrunched his face in confusion. “Isn’t that gay though? Not that I have a problem with gays or anything. Like I don’t have a problem getting off with you or anything, but wouldn’t that make me gay?”

“Nah dude. It’s not gay if the balls don’t touch.”

Clyde nodded, understanding. It made sense. It’s not like him and Kenny were gay for getting off with each other sometimes. Dudes in dp pornos weren’t gay because their balls never touched. It all made sense. 

“We could get each other off you know.”

“What?”

Kenny placed a hand on Clydes thigh, slowly stroking the inside. “We could get each other off. Guys do it all the time. It’s not gay. It’s just like our mutual masterbation. But this time we are helping each other out.”

“But why?”

“I dunno, dude. It feels really nice when someone else gives you a hand job, right? So like that but, each other.”

Clyde thought about it a moment as he watches Edward fuck the lady with his dick hands. He had to admit, handjobs did feel better when they weren’t his hand. Maybe Kenny was right. He wasn’t dating Bebe anymore so there went his sole sorce of sex. He could use to get off by someone else's hand. And Kenny’s hand on his leg was feeling quite nice. Instead of giving an answer, Clyde mimicked Kenny’s movements. As his hand gently caressed Clyde's inner thigh, Clyde did the same.

The movie played on, switching to a home and two women whom were supposed to be the daughter and her friend. Kenny scooted closer to Clyde and began massaging his dick through his jeans. Clyde did the same, finding the action both erotic and weird. It’s not like he’d never seen Kenny do this to himself, but to be doing it for Kenny was just different. Not bad, possibly good, definitely different.

“Undo your pants.”

Clyde whispered, yeah, before grasping Kenny told him to do something. Clyde quickly unfastened his pants and pulled them down and out of the way. It took him a second to realize Kenny never said strip, but instead of letting it be weird, Kenny pulled off his own pants and underwear. Clyde went ahead and removed his boxers before sitting back on the bed with Kenny. This time, his hand met flesh. He didn’t know why he was expecting more hair, he knew Kenny shaved his legs for track and field. His own was covered in light brown hair. Maybe Kenny wouldn’t like it. Maybe it would gross him out. Clyde wouldn’t blame him.

However, Kenny went back to lightly stroking his thigh, even seemed to play with the hair. Both snorted holding back their laughter at the bathroom scene and again as they sat around eating. Kenny’s hand and naked thigh touching him were the only things reminding Clyde this was a porno, but even those things were less of a reminder of the porn than they were a reminder of what was to come.

Something warm hit Clyde's pinky. He looked down in time to see Kenny’s dick twitch and tapping his smallest finger again. This time, Clyde made the first move. He ran the back of his fingers along the underside of Kenny’s dick. It somehow felt smoother than his own and Kenny's moan was pretty hot. Clyde looked up in time to seek Kenny smile, biting his lip, before his own dick was being touched. The sudden contact made him gasp in both surprised and lust. It had been quite a while since someone other than himself touched it, but now he wished him and Kenny had done it sooner.

Clyde grabbed Kenny’s dick in a way he’d want to be touched and began jerking him off, keeping eye contact with him. He felt his own neck lose a bit of strength as Kenny let his head fall and hit the wall. Gasps and heavy breathing escaped them both as the ludacris moans played on in the background. Kenny licked his lips and suddenly, Clyde wanted to kiss them. He wondered if that would be okay, if maybe kissing crossed some kind of line.

“It’s not gay.” Kenny moaned.

:Clyde was confused for a moment before he realized he asked that out loud. He felt his cheeks flush from embarrassment, but then it hit him what Kenny was saying. 

“I can kiss you?”

“Yeah. Not gay because our balls arent touching. As long as you’re comfortable with it. Do it.”

Clyde nodded has he worried his bottom lip. Kenny leaned in, forcing him to finish the distance. Something about kissing Kenny, kissing another guy, felt so final. Like if he did this, nothing would ever be the same again. Was it something Clyde was willing to risk? Dive into this new unknown territory of what could possibly be the ultimate bro relationship? Was this what people called a bromance? 

“Clyde-”

Hearing his name spoken with such a seductive was the driving force. He clashed his lips with Kenny’s. They were dry and chapped and absolutely nothing like Bebe’s. Kenny tasted of top ramen and the warm beer they had consumed. Clyde liked it. It just enforced this was just two dude. And Kenny kissed the way he liked. Bebe always wanted it to be soft and slow. She complained that he used too much tongue, that it was too messy. Kenny was matching his every move, tongue tangling with his own. Even Kenny’s handjob was better. It’s like he knew everything to do it right. It made sense since he too, had a dick and Clyde was trying to get him off as well.

“I’m close,” Kenny warned.

Clyde watched it, fascinated by what was about to happen. He’d seen Kenny come many times before, but he'd never been the cause of it. It was empowering. To his credit, Kenny’s hand never stopped moving as came, moaning, his jizz hitting him in the chest before leaking down his dick on Clyde’s dick.

Fuck was the only word Clyde could get out before he too was coming. The alcohol hit him hard post orgasm. Room spinning, Clyde tried to focus on something, anything. He turned his attention to the TV just in time to see them reenact the snow scene from Edward Scissorhands. But it wasn't snow, it was like rain water or-

“Is- is that suppose to be jizz? Is she twirling like that in a rain of jizz?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. He’s making it rain with his cum.”

Clyde let out a laugh. It was so ridiculous. He’d missed most of the movie but that didn’t seem to matter. Every part of this porno was over the top. 

“Here.” Kenny handed him his wadded up shirt. “You okay man?”

“Yeah.” Clyde took the shirt and wiped up his mess. “I think the beer finally hit me though.”

Even though he’d seen Kenny naked before, there was something rather intimate about seeing him shirtless after what they just did. Was this changing their friendship? Was he ever going to be able to see Kenny the same way? Kenny threw the shirt on his floor before tugging his junk back into his pants. Clyde followed suit and relaxed.

“How are you?” Clyde could smack himself with how stupid he sounded.

“Mmm, I’m good. Tired though. You know we’re still friends, right?”

“Yeah. Yeah, just bros.”

“Just a couple of dudes being guys. Which reminds me of what Cartman did yesterday-”

Clyde smiled as he relaxed and listened to Kenny’s Cartman story. He was right, they were still friends. They were just bros being bros.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please. If you haven't seen Edward Penishands, do yourself a favor and watch it. Then watch the South Park one. They are so funny.


	3. Blue in the Face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clyde is forced to clean. It's another friends story and if I didn't have day 2 already written, I would have used this then. I would also like to point out this is based on real events that happened. You know who you are. You know what you did. Thanks.

It wasn’t like Clyde was bored, he had his friends to talk to in voice chat, but cleaning was such a drag. He had asked his friends but Craig wouldn’t help, Token wouldn’t let him borrow a maid, Kenny just laughed and said he wasn’t that desperate for money. He didn’t get it. It’s not like Clyde’s apartment was that messy, it was just clutter. Just stuff strewn about. He needed to do laundry like three weeks ago, recycling was a bit over flowing, the donation box had become a donation pile.

Two days Clyde had already spent cleaning up. He’d do something then take a break. His friends were at least helping in the motivation department even if they refused to help with the cleaning aspect. Something about “appreciating his own hard work” and “we can’t keep doing it for you.” He supposed they were right, cleaning two-week-old oatmeal out of his bowl was definitely motivation for actually doing dishes before mold growth took place. Having cleaned his own gross ass bathroom and kitchen, Clyde felt like he could definitely do this now.

Most of the small stuff had been taken care of leaving him with getting rid of donations and actually cleaning his bedroom and living room. Which is why Clyde was sitting on the floor, organizing stuff into boxes Tweek and Kenny had brought him. Token had set him a deadline having called a local thrift store to pick up stuff the last day of his vacation. It wasn’t an ideal way to spend it, he'd rather be out having fun. He was an adult though and this needed to be done. How he wished he was still a teen.

Discord was open on his phone, wireless headphones in so he could charge his phone and keep it out of reach. Music played through his tv, low enough to provide background noise, yet not too loud to be a distraction when a bop played. Clyde was proud he’d already filled 7 boxes of stuff. He wasn’t sure why he had a lot of it, like what the hell were the purpose of coasters and why did he need 10 different sets? He knew a lot of this stuff were gifts from others, mostly his overbearing step mom, but there were things he bought and wasn’t sure why. He knew there were things like a football and the jumper cables he should keep in his car, but he always cleaned that stuff out. The car had to be immaculate and uncluttered. Since none of the stuff could be found in his car when he needed it, he would go out and buy a new one instead of going home and getting what he had. 

“Are you close to being done?” Token asked him. 

They had been planning a weekend trip to Denver. The problem was the trip was in three days and Clyde felt like this would take longer than three days.

“I mean, I guess. It’s just, ya know.”

“Nah, man. I don’t.” Even through Discord, Clyde could hear Kenny’s smile. That prick lived with Craig and hardly ever had to clean. “Explain.”

“There’s so much and I don’t even really know, dude. Like what is a citronella candle and why do I need it? This shit stinks!”

He heard some of them laugh as Craig explained to him what it was. Clyde threw it in the donation box.

“See! It’s just overwhelming!”

“Tell your parents to stop buying you shit for your apartment.”

Token was right. He needed to put his foot down with them. He wasn’t a teen anymore. He was a grown-ass 25-year-old. He knew how to live his adult life. An entire book case of sports memorabilia was more than enough. 

“Yeah. Are you guys going to go to the zoo while in Denver?”

“Maybe.” Token went into the planned itinerary as Jimmy kept interrupting to add in what he would be doing instead. 

Clyde kept throwing unknown items into the boxes before him. Why did he have three keyboards? He had a laptop, the pc sat at his desk hardly used as it was. Two of them went into the box, the nicer one stayed as a backup, just in case. Food processor? Made no sense since his half-ass colon did a good enough job of that. No need to help it out. Donate. Broncos Keychain? Donate. Inflatable sword? It was pretty neat and he did enjoy hitting his friends with things. Clyde took the time to blow it up before putting it in a keep box.

A little blue canister rolled down the pile, stopping once it hit Clyde’s foot. Clyde turned the canister around until he could read “Blue Face.” Blue face? Clyde couldn't remember them ever RPing or cosplaying as Avatar or the Blue Man Group. Maybe it was Kenny’s. He didn’t recall Kenny ever blue facing himself, but that didn’t mean jack. Clyde hardly remembered what he ate for breakfast. Clyde grabbed a shirt he didn't care about and laid it out on the floor in front of him. Standing up, he carefully took aim before spraying it at the shirt. Yep. Blue paint.

“Hey did anyo- ahhh!” Clyde barely got the words out before his throat and nose started burning. “Oh god.”

Rounds of concerned what's when about as Clyde coughed. 

“What the fuck, Clyde!?”

“I don’t know! My throat burns. Oh god. I sprayed-” Clyde tried to talk as he walked over to his phone, coughing along the way. “I sprayed this. Blue face. Picture. Oh god.”

Clyde snapped a quick picture of the side with blue face. And walked into the kitchen for water. Or really anything. His friends were in a panic at his distress. Token and Craig saying he needed to drink something, Tweek yelling to call poison control, Jimmy offering him a lift to the emergency room. Clyde was irritated at his past self for not filling his water pitcher. He wasn’t desperate enough to drink unfiltered water. The only other option was almond milk so old he wasn’t sure which ex bought it or beer. 

Suddenly Kenny erupted with laughter. “Dude! You maced yourself!” 

Mace? Clyde coughed and took a second look at the canister in his hand. Sure enough, right next to blue face it said pepper spray. His friends all erupted in laughter at realizing their friend didn't poison himself. Clyde tried laughing at himself but erupted in coughs instead. Through their laughter, his friends were yelling instructions on what to do. Open a window, drink whole milk, go outside, toss the shirt outside, burn the shirt. 

Clyde was grateful his apartment had a balcony. He opened the sliding door and threw the shirt to the far end, taking a moment to take deep breaths of fresh air. He needed milk. He couldn’t drive like this. He needed to work on cleaning so he could go with them this weekend. He hardly made a noise before his friends were quiet a moment and panic mode ensued amongst them. The more worried they got, the harder Clyde began to cry. He was doing so well until he made this small stupid mistake. 

“I just!” Clyde’s crying brought with it a new round of coughing. “I was doing good! I wanna go! And enjoy my vacation!”

“Hey. Hey Clyde. Don’t worry about it-” Kenny started, which just set him off, crying even harder, hiccups and all.

“I’m gonna fall behind. I can’t continue. This is stupid!”

Clyde blindly hit the disconnect button on his phone and laid on his floor to cry. He always failed at this stuff. He couldn’t keep his life in order because he was always goofing off. He was never going to amount to anything. 

A knock on his door quieted him for a moment. It was probably a neighbor again, thinking he was an abused child. The door opened and Jimmy walked. He was the person closest to him, distance-wise.

“What are you doing?”

“I brought you s-s-s-some udder juice.”

“That’s nice.” Clyde tried not to feel ungrateful, his friend did come all the way here to bring him milk, but so what? He was still a failure. 

“Considering you live on the only building with seven h-h-hundred stairs, I’m a fucking hero.”

He was too busy wallowing in self loath to notice anyone else came in until Kenny stepped over him. Clyde turned to see it was indeed Kenny and he'd brought Craig and Tweek, who were still awkward over breaking up. Kenny sat where Clyde had been as Jimmy handed him a glass of milk. Clyde took it and drank half the glass. It definitely helped, but there was still an uncomfortableness to his throat. Token emerged from his room, carrying a fan. Confused on when he even got there, Clyde made a noise as he drank the rest of the milk.

“You were doing good.” Craig explained as he picked up a garbage bag and handed it to Tweek and getting himself one as well.

“What dumbass is saying,” Kenny picked up a Teddy bear and changed into his children’s therapy voice. “You were doing so well on your own, we’re here to help you so you don’t fall behind.”

Clyde started to cry again, happy he had such amazing friends. 

“Yeah yeah. Hey, why do you have these?”

Clyde turned to see Craig holding some toys Bebe had left behind and blushed. They all laughed as they began helping him clear out his mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading these! Maybe I'll finish the other 2 says and add them in some day!


End file.
